sitting in a yellow, painting van in front of a 7-eleven in carson city during the lunch hour
he smacks me in the face & throws the gun in my lap
he screams that it's a gun dumb-a$$ & they're made for killing people
he tells me that his life is worthless & needs to be over
he reaches over & makes me grab the gun
he puts the gun to my temple & spits in my face
he starts to cry uncontrollably & smacks me again for looking @ him
he puts the pistol in his mouth & bites down on the muzzle
he then screams at me, "do it now! just pull the trigger!
kill me, jay! i order you to kill me"!
w/extreme fear, i whispered, "Jesus loves you, dad".
5 comments:
[shudder] How old were you?
i believe around 10.
[Shudder too] God bless you. I'm renewing prayers for the continued restoraation of the somewhat younger boy we have talked about before too.
i can't even imagine the trauma this must have been to you jay.
this type of event was rather common for me. not to feel sorry for myself, but to express these things as Jesus does his renewing/healing in me. though my case is rather extreme, all people have been hurt & i'm hoping that they'll seek healing as well. i also believe that healing will be an ongoing process, for everyone (not just the really messed-up) & it will be lifelong. 1 HUGE misconception of emotional healing is that "it's for the really wounded ones". we're all wounded & continue to be wounded by others. healing needs a continual place in our lives. thanks for the support.
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