Grace: Double-Standard Considerations

I have apparently gotten myself caught in a double-standard trap. When I irritate someone, I always want them to give me grace & be patient. I want them to show me some grace by quickly shrugging it off. I know (now) that I can be irritating w/high levels of intensity & sometimes an attitude. I can say that now.

I think we all want the people we come in contact with to quickly get past/over the damage done quickly. "Get over it. Can we move on? Don't get so stuck on things." When I irritate or offend Mindy, I want her to get over it & be happy w/me w/in seconds. I want to be able to confess my mistake, then have everything all better. You know what I mean?

It has come to my attention that I expect grace that I don't give. I want some leeway to mess up, but I don't give it. I want people to pay & I usually accomplish this through lecturing & magnified guilt trips. I'm a keeper. :>) Do you see my double-standard action here? When touching on fault-finding/record-keeping, I want my record to be quickly erased from the proverbial dry-erase-board, but for others I get out my engraving gun & press down really hard.

In marriages or any close relationship, we can pick each other apart, but don't like it when it's our turn. I'm going to become more of a grace-giver. I will be more thoughtful when it comes to pointing to faults too quickly. I will give more grace when people irritate me or do something wrong. I will not correct or confront loved ones in front of others. I will praise publicly & criticize in private. I will not relegate Mindy to a child level by correcting her in front of my children. This causes damage for Mindy & my girls. I don't want my girls to think this is an acceptable way to be treated by men. I want to respect & value Mindy & correcting her in front of her children is just wrong.

I will work on this w/persistence, as this needs an immediate 180.